A 2D World

 Original tune & lyrics by Tim Rice and Alan Menken   

I can show you a world—

Maybe not shining, but splendid—

Where I can’t remember the last time

Part of my skin wasn’t dyed.

Such an intricate art,

Lines and spaces at play…

Why is this horse green?

Oh well, it’s a rough draft anyway.

A 2D world: an old yet simple point of view.

This medium doesn’t show depth, I know,

But I can flatten any object on cue.

This 2D world: so many scrolls ruined by a cat

Or by my dragging sleeves, and remember, please:

Keep your tea and wash water separate.

(Or you’ll hallucinate a whole new world!)

Unbelievable hours,

Chained to my chair for weeks.

Two scrolls by Thursday?!

Looks like I’m not getting any sleep.

Our 2D world (don’t you dare lick that scroll!)

Just say “thanks” once so we think you care.

We hope in your new scroll’s home, it might get shown,

But after it’s buried in a pile of garb somewhere.

For a 2D world of beautiful art, we hope and pray.

When gilding and paint won’t stick, we mutter “Shiiiii…oops!”

That’s the most explicit thing I can say[1].

A world in two dimensions is where I’ll be,

‘Cause we don’t see the third ‘til the fourteenth century.

[1]Originally performed from the point of view of a 5th century monk